I found my engagement ring...

It wasn't lost, but it was in our safe. I don't ever wear it. I have had to get the prongs redone twice, and there would be no sense wearing it to the hospital. It sticks out high, but it isn't a BLING ring. I just worry I would lose that precious little diamond. Why am I telling you this? I have been secretly keeping it tucked away for Matthew. I want to give it to him when he finds that special girl, or boy!

I have had relationship talks with Matthew for a couple of years. He first came to me in kinder, and told me that he liked only boys one day. I was like, "Yeah, I only like girls, I understand." He said, "No, but I mean, I think I like boys." :) fine by me! I was like, oh..I understand now. I just hugged him, and said "It's okay to like whoever you like, Mom and Dad will always be here if you need us to be."

I want him to grow up in a house where he feels the love, and feels he can tell us those deep dark secrets. Okay. I know no matter what type of dialogue I dream up, and tell him, he will always harbor secrets, it is life, and we fear honesty. I knew my mom and I were close, but I wasn't going to tell her what boys were asking to do with me when I was a young girl. The moment I tried, and got close to telling her, the next thing I knew, we were moving to where we are now..she uprooted me out of that school system so fast. And, I appreciate it now. I hated her then, of course. Had she not, I wouldn't be that person I am now, and would have fallen into peer pressure.

So fast forward...Matthew and I talk a lot. We have a good relationship. We do the stranger danger talks, and we just talk about love, life, and those nitty gritty things. I think it is important for him to grow up into a man, and to be able to talk about what is going on in his mind. I don't want him to be reserved when he gets older, and life is complicated. He is a cool dude.

I showed him the ring tonight. I said, "I have been saving this for you!" He asked why. I said, "When you find that special someone you want to spend the rest of your life with, you will know what to do with it." He then sat, and thought for a moment. He goes, "I think it will end up being a girl. It's how I am feeling lately." I just shrugged. I said, "It's cool, Matthew. If you change your mind, and there is no rush into making that choice now, I am always here to talk with you." I asked him if he thought girls were looking more pretty lately, and he said yes. I asked him if he had feelings of wanting to kiss someone yet, and he said, "Not really, yet." I assured him he has all of the time in the world, as as soon as he kisses someone his phone won't stop ringing, and if it is a girl, she will get a case of the goo-goo-gaga's, and she will get super boy crazy. He laughed, and asked if that is what happened with me, and daddy. I said, "Oh yes! I couldn't stop calling your daddy. I was boy crazy!" He just told me I was silly. Yes, Matthew. I am silly. Silly crazy for you, and I want you to just be happy. That's all.