I have some of the best friends.

I never knew I could have the amount of support as I did yesterday. Friends were there left and right lending me an ear, giving me encouragement, and it makes me heart them all so much. I seriously cannot put into words how amazing it was to get notice after notice on my phone that I was getting a new comment on my FB. Thank you everyone for being here for me, and loving all of us. Words really, truly cannot express the amount of thanks I want to say. You are all more than generous. I think about myself, could I be that good to a friend? I don't know. I mean..I love my friends, but never know the "right" thing to say.

I texted my sister Dee shortly after we said goodbye to Maddie: "Maddie has grown her wings, Dee." She replies: "Yes, but she won't fly too high, she will always be with you, near you." Gawd I love her. I love all of you. Thank you, thank you, thank you.

The whole process was needed to be able to have closure. Mike took the kids to school and daycare, and he came back, and we both laid on our bed with her. We pet her non-stop, and told her over and over how sorry we were, and how much she was loved. We told her she was such a good girl, and how she did many jobs, and we knew she was tired. I can't tell you all how important it was for us to do this. We hugged her tight, and just never stopped touching her, rubbing her, talking to her. I then got ready, and we called them to say we were on our way.

Once there, we went through the side as to not have to make her walk that far. Our vet was out to lunch, (they had accidentally scheduled us with another Dr.) when I asked if her vet was coming in, they told us no...but they would call her to see if see if she could come, and she was there in less than 3 minutes. We signed all of the paperwork, and just spent those emotional last moments with her.

Her passing was very peaceful, and very quickly. We needed to be there. Had we left, she would have been scared in her final moments, as she always was nervous when we left her at the drs office. I didn't want her scared, and not knowing what was going to happen. Only Mike and I know what she went through in those last moments, and I will cherish the memories, and know that I did the right thing. I have to know it was the right thing to do. Her dr was very encouraging to us. She said that she was not weight bearing at all, and she would never ever cry, or whine in pain if she wasn't now.

We will see Maddie again..just not now. I pray that she will be in our hearts forever and ever. I will have her again in a couple of weeks when we get her back from the funeral home. I will take some of her ashes and take them to the beach as that was her favorite place to go. Maddie was the stereotypical "bird dog". She loved to chase the seagulls at the beach. Her tail would go stick straight, and she was on call, ready to pounce.

I will get another Golden some day, but not today. No dog will ever replace her. But nothing can ever mimic the love of a Golden Retriever. They are the best dogs ever, and they never stop smiling. Maddie loved hard, and she never got the memo that she was a dog. She thought she was a skin kid. I love my Madison Sue.